San Francisco, Are You Okay?
This week on the Horth House: Aly talked about her hatred for San Francisco. Aly also discussed staying positive when you have grown up without a parent.
This week’s episode was a wild ride. I recently went on a trip to San Francisco and was quickly reminded how much I dislike this city! Between the disease-riddled restrooms, the public fornication, being peed on by a homeless man, and a bar that closed at 9 pm on a Saturday, I was in disbelief. My visit to the Bay Area left me asking two questions San Francisco, are you okay, and is Bobby a vampire?
We start by recapping an experience with my beloved friend Bobby. Bobby was the star of this week’s show. This man spent his Saturday evening alone at a bar, reading old group texts, matching ensembles with me, and listening to a football game on his headphones.
I always enjoy people-watching; it's fascinating to observe people's mannerisms in the wild. Bobby was hands down one of the best people I’ve ever observed. He was drunk, laughing to himself, and all alone. This man did not once speak to anyone or look up from his phone. While at the bar, I thought nothing of Bobby's continuous drinking or his obsession with reading old group messages. When I woke up the next day, I thought to myself, is Bobby a vampire? The man never ate, never moved, never went to the bathroom, never spoke to anyone, yet everyone knew what he wanted. Potentially doing mind control on the bartenders, never eating, only being out at night, being alone . . . It seems a little sus to me!
Next on the San Francisco list of pros & cons is Dave.
Dave - the man with the Big Dad Energy. The man who dared to order a blended cocktail 20 minutes after the last call. The man who bargained with the bartender about staying after hours to watch the Arizona State football game. Dave - The man, the myth, the legend.
Dave was one of the kindest and most ridiculous people I have ever met. He had a few absolutely not moments, but the highlight of our interaction was seeing the joy Dave had in his eyes when he spoke about his daughter. He showed my partner and me a picture and repeatedly said, "I'm sorry I don't have a better picture!" He was so proud of his little girl. She was experiencing her first homecoming dance with a date, and Dave decided to come down to the local brewery, just in case she needed him. The dance was only a couple blocks up the road. Seeing Dave have that level of love reminded me of how many times I watched kids have those moments with their parents when I was a child. It was a beautiful moment watching Dave light up, and thankfully this allowed for a bit of redemption for San Francisco.
Lastly, I touched on a few pointers I have learned over the years about remaining strong while recognizing the disadvantages of not having a parent.
Here are a few of the lessons I have learned over the years:
You are not alone
It’s important to remember although the situations may differ, thousands, if not millions, of people, feel exactly like you.
The best way to go through something is to grow through it
Allow yourself to be open to change and growth. This change leads to a potentially happier and more successful life.
Know that every emotion or experience you have is completely normal and valid
What happened to you was not your fault; it can be difficult to see that sometimes.
It’s okay to be angry, confused, sad, happy, frustrated, relieved, and resentful. Every emotion has a place and is valid.
Find a bigger purpose for your pain
Heal through your situation by finding a way to use your pain to serve a bigger mission.
That’s what I did with this podcast; I turned my pain of not having a dad into a career.
Being parentless is an ever-evolving journey in your life
Not everyone comprehends what it’s like growing up without a parent. As difficult as that is to grasp, it is okay if people don’t understand.
This is your journey. Remember to be easy with yourself. You are a superhuman, not a superhero.
Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I look forward to sharing more with you all. If you would like to share your story, please, contact The Horth House.
A full transcript is available with each episode for anyone with a hearing impairment. Please don't hesitate to get in touch with The Horth House if you have any questions.
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